relationships


All the Guts, None of the Glory

  The story of my life. Put the work in and watch my stepchildren’s biological mother take credit in any way she can. Being a stepparent requires you to fill a large role quietly. I stubbornly fought the idea because I wanted to get credit for all the work required […]

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Pensive Stepmom

Stepmom with fingers in her ears

When the “Old Life With the Ex” Comes Up

In blended family life, there are a lot of people who bring up the old times. I mean, everybody does it. YOU DO IT! Your partner, the stepkid(s), extended family, friends, the ex, and even strangers. Oh yes! Strangers get in on this too.   Several years into our relationship, […]


Parental Alienation: Our Grief Has a Name

They didn’t die, but there are days I think it might’ve been easier. At least we’d have closure, a definite ending, something.  Instead, we’re grieving children that made a million memories here in this home, under that tree in our front yard who now live down the street and have new […]

Grieving Couple

Family Vacation

From the File of Difficult Conversations: Planning Family Vacations

Among my stepmom files is a folder labeled “Difficult Conversations.” It’s one of those expandable file folders and, just over four years in, it’s already overflowing. This folder could also be aptly named, “Surprise! Stepparenting is Hard!” because (a) it is, and (b) this, somehow, still surprises me. Despite a […]


Digging Deeper into Forgiveness

For this blog, I thought that I would dig deeper into the Magic 7 from a previous blog of mine. In particular, I want to take a look at the last 2 points:  Learning to repair and letting it go. Here’s what I said in the last post on the two […]

Woman Thinking About Forgiveness

Woman Holding Hands Showing Support

5 Way to Support Someone Experiencing Parental Alienation

Chances are, right now you know someone experiencing parental alienation and don’t know it.  If you’ve never heard of it, consider yourself lucky.  Parental alienation is a form of emotional abuse that tears away at the very core of the relationship between parent and child.  Those going through it feel out of control, […]


Visualize Your Future Self

As stepmoms, it can be easy for us to get embroiled in what is currently happening in our stepfamily, whether it is a custody battle or disciplinary issues with our stepchildren. We forget to think about what we want for the future. The custody battle will end, and your stepchildren will […]

Stepmom in Thought