mum


Living in the Shadow

You are going to have good days and you are going to have bad days. It’s part of being human. In your stepfamily you may feel more of the extremes than anywhere else in your life. Some days you will feel like you are queen of the world and everything […]

Stepmom Thinking

Mother and adult daughter

All Mothers Matter

I watched my grandmother die today. She was nearly 93, at the end of a long and storied life, and she had no pain. My mother and I were with her, alone together in the room as she left us. In offering condolences, the hospice workers commented on how sweet […]


A Message for Partners on Mother’s Day: What Stepmoms Want You to Know

I’ve known my stepchildren for over 7 years …7 YEARS! That’s more than half their lives, yet I get reminded of my lack of belonging continuously throughout the year. Stepmom’s deal with this purposeful separation and take it personally, even if we don’t show it.  Mother’s Day is often the […]

Parents reading to children

Stepmom and Stepdaughter

Happy Mother’s Day to the Under-Defined Mother Figures Out There

I don’t have a word to use that articulates the kinship tie I share with my boyfriend’s daughter.  I’m simply “daddy’s girlfriend,” because at this point, only marriage can afford me a recognizable motherhood title like “stepmom.” But I am something to this child that reaches far beyond “daddy’s girlfriend.” […]


Their Stepmum is More Exciting Than You and You HAVE to Accept That

New family. It’s not what you lay in bed dreaming of when you were small and imaging how your life might be as a grown up. You don’t ever really want to end up sharing your own children’s weekends with another woman (or man) only linked to you by virtue of the fact […]

Stepmum chasing Stepson

Stepmum and ex shaking hands

Stepmums: Signs You May Need to Call Time on Befriending Your Partner’s Ex

So, you’ve started dating a guy who has children with his ex. Evidently, you want your stepmum journey to be as plain sailing as possible, and this means attempting to get along with your stepchildren and even your partner’s ex. Now, when I mention the word ‘befriend’, I don’t mean […]