belonging


The 4 S’s – Personality Types in Step-Families

If our children are to approve of themselves, they must first see that we approve of ourselves.(Maya Angelou ‘Rainbow in the Cloud’ 2014) In my experience, one of the things that helps get me back on track when I am feeling I can do nothing ‘right’, is to remind myself […]


Couple Talking

15 Things Stepmom Wishes Her Husband Knew

In that moment, I knew I couldn’t say anything to make him understand. I could verbalize my emotions until I was blue in the face, but he just wasn’t going to make sense of my words. Exhausting myself trying to explain why I was struggling as a stepmom and needed […]


Why Blended Can Feel More Like Broken

Changing the words used to describe a problem does not necessarily change the underlying issue. In fact, I worry that it can actually discredit the true experiences that real people are living. We are a “blended” family, but sometimes it feels more broken than blended. My husband and I got married […]


Lonely Girl

A Stepchild’s Perspective: the Worst Part About Having a Stepmom

My dad married my stepmom when I was eight. When the officiate asked me if I would welcome her into our family, my mouth said “yes,” while my whole body screamed “no.” That was before I even had any idea of what it would be like. I just knew that […]


Employee of the Week

Imagine, if you will, that you work in a business where as part of the normal workflow you must work every other week at a different location. You pack up all your stuff – you might even need to put it in a large briefcase on wheels – and go […]

Woman at Work

Stepmom Receiving Gift

A Message for Partners on Mother’s Day: What Stepmoms Want You to Know

I’ve known my stepchildren for over 7 years …7 YEARS! That’s more than half their lives, yet I get reminded of my lack of belonging continuously throughout the year. Stepmom’s deal with this purposeful separation and take it personally, even if we don’t show it.  Mother’s Day is often the […]


Fitting in as a Stepmom on Mother’s Day

As Mother’s Day approaches I have been reflecting on motherhood. As it tends to do, it has also shone a light on step-motherhood. I am a stepmom of 3 adult stepchildren and the biological mother of 2 girls. We are clear about what moms SHOULD be. The ideal? Mothers are […]

Parents reading to children