Couples


What to Do When Your Marriage Is Not Number 1

One of the most painful and repeated stories I hear in my work with stepparents is that they often feel like they take a back seat to their stepkids. They feel like they are not the priority for their partner and that awareness creates a particularly acute and unique kind […]

Couple Supporting Each Other

Couple Holding Hands

Finish Before You Begin Again

My area of expertise is working with couples in stepfamilies. Divorce rates are up to 70% the second time around and increase again for the third time. Those statistics are shocking, and for me heartbreaking because of the work I do. There are many more complicating factors in second marriages […]


Lessons Learned When I Embraced My Role as Second Wife

Coming into my role as a second wife to the love of my life was no easy feat. It’s as if everywhere I turned there was another reminder of his former life, of the woman he loved before me. It was inescapable, perpetual torture. I wanted to surprise his mom […]

Stepmom Thinking

Couple Talking

15 Things Stepmom Wishes Her Husband Knew

In that moment, I knew I couldn’t say anything to make him understand. I could verbalize my emotions until I was blue in the face, but he just wasn’t going to make sense of my words. Exhausting myself trying to explain why I was struggling as a stepmom and needed […]


7 Signs Your Boyfriend is a Great Dad

Parenthood. It’s scary, it’s rewarding, it’s nothing you’ve ever done before. Having kids wasn’t on your cards yet, or maybe even ever, but now you find yourself dating someone with kids. Here, here! That was me 7 years ago. I raise a glass of wine to you because life is […]

Father and Son Playing

Pensive Stepmom

The Metaphor That Changed My Entire Perspective on the Stepmom Role

I was in a really bad place. The slightest mention of the family he had before me sent me into turmoil and agony. I didn’t understand why I couldn’t come first. Why I couldn’t be his only. I loved his daughter, and logically, I understood that without his first wife, […]


10 Tips for Healthy Stepcoupling

Marriage is tough stuff. It takes intentional work to keep the fire that brought you together burning. There will be many times when the fires burn bright and strong and there will be many times when the embers are barely visible or felt. Re-marriage adds extra layers of complications and […]

Happy Couple Sitting on the Couch